


Wanna Be My Player Two?

by InsolentParis



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: But yes homo yes homo tho, Fanfiction, Fluff, Frottage, M/M, NSFW, Smut, This has ungodly amounts of no homo btw, This'll have at least 5 chapters, boyf riends — Freeform, generic sleepover fanfiction, jeremy is bi, soon, there will be smut, this is lowkey all i want
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-18
Updated: 2017-05-18
Packaged: 2018-11-02 05:38:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,368
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10938111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InsolentParis/pseuds/InsolentParis
Summary: "Hey! That's not fair!""Haha! Way too slow for your own good."It was almost 2 AM and an iconically inseperable duo of teenagers were lying on two stuffy yet surprisingly comfortable bean bags, playing what looks like the retro version of Mario Kart against each other.





	1. Chapter 1

"Hey! That's not fair!"

"Haha! Way too slow for your own good."

It was almost 2 AM and an iconically inseperable duo of teenagers were lying on two stuffy yet surprisingly comfortable bean bags playing, what looks like the retro version of Mario Kart against each other. They were having so much fun they didn't seem to have a care in the world.

"I'm not slow! You totally pussied out and used a bomb on me!"

"That's what you get for using banana peels too much, Jeremy!"

Well except for winning and losing of course.

It's been a while since Michael and Jeremy had a sleepover like this one, especially since the whole supercomputer-related catastrophe happened they didn't really have time to properly hang out.

Actually they did have time, lots of it, but the squip decided to turn Jeremy a colossal dickhead and cut off any connection he had with Michael, even blocking him from his physical field of vision. Jeremy literally couldn't see him at all for months.

Of course this caused some major backlash on Michael as he desperately tried to find ways to get his best friend back, sending him messages, passing him notes, he even tried full on fighting this one time only have every attacked dodged by a supercomputer-possessed Jeremy.

And even after everything that happened, after the excruciatingly long time Michael spent at the hospital, worrying and waiting for his best friend to recover from the possible brain damage the squip might've caused, they still weren't able to spend time together properly, because of all the catching up Jeremy had to do in school.

At least all of that was in the past now though, their friendship only strengthened by all that they've been through and they could hang out just like the good old days.

Jeremy relished the time he spent with Michael because it was always a barrel of laughs, which was also probably why he was his designated 'favorite person' of all time.

"Boom. Beat you again." Michael gloated

Except when he was losing at Mario Kart of course.

"Screw you man! Best four out of seven!"

It wasn't a very well known fact but Jeremy Heere did indeed suck at Mario Kart, and Micheal did everything he could to remind him of it.

Still, there was something off about Jeremy which he couldn't quite explain, maybe he's been pushing away some thoughts of a certain kind that he's been having for a while. Maybe it's been so persistent that Jeremy had no choice but to notice them. Maybe it was nothing. Yeah it was probably nothing, mostly because it was ridiculous. Michael was his best friend he couldn't possibly.....

Nevertheless, he's been zoning out from time to time and it's inadvertently caused him to lose so many rounds, more than usual. He'd mostly catch himself just flat out staring at him, and on the rare occasion he wasn't, he was thinking about him.

It was really weird but he just couldn't stop.

"Still not tired of losing yet? Well how can I resist but to whoop your ass over and over again!"

"......."

"Uhhh Jeremy? Jeremy! Earth to Jeremy...Yo Jeremy!"

_Oh shit he noticed._

"Gah...bwah...."

"What is up with you toady man, did you hit the weed without me or something?" Michael questioned "Because if you did, you owe me a slushie man, that's **our** special bonding time."

"O-of course not, I was just thinking about some things!"

"What kind of 'things'."

"I-uh..." Jeremy stammered "College and stuff, you ever think about what you wanna take up in the future?"

"Man, save that headache for another day."

Jeremy was lying of course, it would be awkward to tell someone you were thinking about them, especially another dude. That would be kinda gay.

"Hey, are we go another round or not? Or are ya to scared?" Michael smirked and somehow that was all Jeremy could think of

Which was absurd. He wasn't even gay, he liked girls for god's sake! He's just been having some really gay thoughts lately.

"Y-yeah sure."

There was an obnoxiously loud storm brewing outside but the two teenagers couldn't care any less. They were having mindless, senseless fun like they used to, all was well.

"Check this out Jeremy! Rainbow Road time! Here we go!"

  
**KRRAAAACKKKKKKKKKK**

  
"AW WHAT THE FUCK."

Both teenagers were scared shitless as all the lights in the house went off at the same time a crashing sound of thunder filled their eardrums. The only light source left, being the quiet, dim glow of their cellphones.

After probably feeling what it was like to have a heart attack, Jeremy and Michael took a moment to collectively calm down and pick themselves up from the floor.

"Jesus fuck, that scared the living daylights outta me."

"It also scared the lights out of the house." Jeremy's blood was still pumping "Hmm, wait here, I'm gonna look for some lanterns."

"You're gonna leave me alone in the daaaark, where all the bedroom monsters are gonna come and eat me?"

"You can fight them off for five minutes."

"Just so you know, this is how people die in horror films!"

"You'll be fine."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Dramatic horror music*


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy didn't have any luck finding the emergency lights anywhere in the house, which is concerning because he's lived here for most of his teenage life. He was pretty jumpy today, more than usual, and his relentless clumsiness proved just that.
> 
> He's been deliberately bumping into a series of household objects and cursing at every single one of them he stubbed his toes on. Which is every one of them.

Jeremy didn't have any luck finding the emergency lights anywhere in the house, which is concerning because he's lived here for most of his teenage life. He was pretty jumpy today, more than usual, and his relentless clumsiness proved just that.

He's been deliberately bumping into a series of household objects and cursing at every single one of them he stubbed his toes on. Which is every one of them.

This wasn't one of his proudest moments.

Nevertheless, it has given his mind time to wander and think, about....certain things, besides the stinging pain in all of his toes. He's been thinking about Michael a lot lately, and and it's began to concern him more than he'd like to admit.

He's probably just overthinking this. There was nothing to worry about. He's probably just excited that after so long he's finally gonna sleep with his best friend again- _ **oh wait that sounds wrong.**_

He's probably just excited that he finally had his best friend again for a sleepover, like they used to do. He couldn't help it if he was thinking about him, he was his best friend after all, and thinking about them was a normal thing.

And it didn't help that he was there every day to greet him whenever they'd see each other. That he was one of the few people he'd always love to hang out with. Or how he had this infectious laugh that could make him forget a bad day. How he had those eyes that light up ever so slightly whenever he smiled. How he always smelled vaguely of peppermint and weed. How his hair were in perfect curls and for some reason he'd just want to run his hands-

**Fuck. There he goes again.**

It's not like he's actively trying to do it, it just happens, and whenever he tries to block it out, his train of thought just goes in an inescapable loop and inevitably to the one thing he's been trying to push away since the day he heard it.

"Is he your boyfriend?"

Just the thought of that made his breathing sharper and something in his chest cavity tighten because no way in hell that he'd ever entertain the idea of "his heart skipping a beat". This wasn't some cheesy rom-com, this was real life. And besides, it wasn't like he thought of Michael that way, he's just weirded out that, that could even be a possibility.

Although the not so subtle heat on his cheeks were telling him otherwise.

_Focus Jeremy! Look for the lights!_

Right. He was still wandering aimlessly in the dark, and he was still looking for the ever-elusive lanterns....wait a minute, his phone has a flashlight why doesn't he just turn that on?

As Jeremy flicked open his flashlight function, everything became effortlessly easiser and he wondered why he didn't think of this in the first place.

He found himself searching for the emergency lanterns in the living room, where they were hidden just inside a snug little utility cabinet. He also passed by their coffee table which had his laptop on it and Jeremy made a mental note to bring that upstairs too.

Since, the power was off and they couldn't play video games on his console setup anymore, watching cartoons on his laptop could be a nice alternative. Watching cartoons also meant, both of them snuggled up in his bed with only inches of space between them and Jeremy couldn't understand why he liked that idea so much.

After the dreadfully long time he spent downstairs, he was finally able to go back to his room, appliances in hand and expecting a insincerely scared Michael to tease him about why he took so long.

He didn't get to see any of that though, instead he found an empty room and an eerily silent atmosphere and he began to wonder if his supposed 'bedroom monsters' were actually real and if they'd just eaten his best friend.

"Michael, where hell are you. I know you're hiding."

.

.

.

.

  
No response. Jeremy sighed.

He rooted around the room slowly and sneaky-like, tiptoe-ing for extra effect.

"If I was Michael...where would I hide..."

 

  
**CREEEEEAAAAAK**

 

  
"Hmm." Jeremy's turns his head to the noise pretty sure he's won this game of 'hide-and-scare-the-shit-outta-your best-friend-seek'.

"I would hide....IN THE CLOSET!"

.

.

.

Shit. It was empty which meant-

" **YOU GUESSED WRONG JEREMY.** "

"OH WHAT THE FUCK."

Michael shocked him so much that every primal instinct inside his teenage body screamed 'oh shit' as he got aggressively hugged from behind which in turn made them both fall to the floor in shambles of disoriented laughter.

They were both messily writhing on the floor in a moment of relief from all the anticipation, Jeremy's reaction was half muttering "holyshitwhy's" over and over again, and half almost pissing himself laughing. Michael couldn't help but chuckle at his efforts as well.

"Whyyyyy whyyy do you do this." Jeremy said in between laughs

"That's what you get for **literally** keeping me in the dark."

"Oh my god you're such an ass!"

"But you loooove it."

Michael teases and Jeremy smiles at him with tinted cheeks, but this time, he doesn't seem to care.

They were both still on his bedroom floor, completely silent and they somehow seem content with that. They could do this anytime they wanted, anywhere they wanted, and they weren't pressured to be cool or not cool or even anything. They could just be themselves.

"So what do you wanna do now?" Michael asked

"Watch cartoons 'till we pass out from exhaustion?"

"Sounds good to me."

Eventually the two teenagers stopped lying down on Jeremy's rough bedroom floor, to lie down on his less rough bedroom bed to do what they'd normally do on a Saturday night; technically Sunday morning.

Michael would get a bunch of books from a bookshelf that Jeremy would never read from. Jeremy would load up his laptop and search for cartoons they could watch. And they'd both carefully position said laptop on a tower of books Michael's constructed, and pray to god that Michael was good enough to be an architect.

Same old, same old.

"What do you wanna watch?" Jeremy said, twiddling on his computer

"I dunno, you pick."

"Hmm. Teen titans?"

"Too serious." Michael protested

"How about....Steven Universe? I heard that it's good."

"Too emotional."

"How about Avatar then?"

"Too serious and too emotional."

 

"Gravity falls."

"Still too emotional." This was getting ridiculous

"Pokemon!"

"That's funny."

"Spongebob?!"

"Only when we're high."

"Gah! What then?" Jeremy said, irritated

"Fine scooch over, lemme pick."

"I've been letting you pick the entire time..." Jeremy says, half mumbling, half groaning

He does as he says though, and gives way to his indecisive friend, who casually jumps on the bed. He began scrolling down on the alphabetically organized folders as Jeremy watched with slight impatience and irritation. For a moment, he scrolls past a suspicious folder titled 'x' and Jeremy has the faintest idea that maybe they should watch that together instead.

He doesn't do any of that of course, mostly because the moment he realizes what he was thinking about, he's blushing. His eyes widen, his hands grip on the covers, and a jolt of ' _whateverthefuckthatfeelingis_ ' shoots throughout his body and to somewhere he'd rather not talk about.

Jeremy wasn't okay.

"Alright, Voltron season one." Michael chimed in

" _ **GrE** AT_ ~~_tH **A**_~~ _TS_   _Gr_ **e** ~~AT~~. **MM** ~~ _m_~~ - **HM** ~~ _ **MM**_~~."

"Hey Jer....are you okay? Michael questioned "You look kinda red."

"NOTHING LET'S JUST GO WATCH THE COOL SPACE-CATS."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haha, he has a boner.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The rest of the night (early morning) went pretty tame actually. They hardly got three episodes in, when Jeremy's beat-up laptop decided to finally die on them, enciting a collective groan of annoyance from both of the two impatient teenagers.
> 
> It was less than what they were hoping for, and they'd rather just fall asleep in the middle of an episode or something, but it was a sort of long shot to rely on a computer that was barely charged to last them the entire night.

The rest of the night (early morning) went pretty tame actually. They hardly got three episodes in, when Jeremy's beat-up laptop decided to finally die on them, enciting a collective groan of annoyance from both of the two impatient teenagers.

It was less than what they were hoping for, and they'd rather just fall asleep in the middle of an episode or something, but it was a sort of long shot to rely on a computer that was barely charged to last them the entire night.

~~At least it was enough to distract Jeremy from the thought of watching porn with his best friend.~~

At least it was enough to distract Jeremy from whatever unholy thoughts were running through his mind.

It was already past 3 AM, which was a bit later than they'd usually stay up, so they'd figured that it was finally time to do the one thing sleepovers were made for, sleep.

Michael says something about brushing his teeth and goes in the bathroom while Jeremy burrows himself under the covers. It felt pretty uneventful and Jeremy can't stop asking himself why he felt that way.

Instead of overthinking it like he did to  everything these past hours, he shrugs it off, ready to finally sleep off all the tension he **definitely** wasn't feeling from earlier. 

He almost manages this, when an equally drowsy Michael joins him in the bed, climbs under the covers, and just nonchalantly positions himself as close to his best friend as humanly possible.

_Fuck. FuckFuckFuckFuckFuck._

Jeremy wasn't thinking about this of course. He totally isn't focused on the intense sheen of body heat his best friend was producing that was both intoxicating and welcoming. Or how his arm was casually slung around Jeremy's stomach, with fingers that reached dangerously lower than it should. Or how his face was warmer than it ever had been in his entire life.

.....

Okay maybe he is thinking about it.

But he doesn't say anything, in case it makes Michael move away. That's selfish, and he knows, but it's not like he's doing anything wrong.

He isn't sure if Michael is this close because he has no choice or if he's more comfortable like this. Either way, it's made him all the more aware of every single inch of skin that was touching. Which was a lot.

"Hey. You awaaaake?" Michael's not so subtle whispering was thankfully enough to shake him off his thought process.

"Nah, I'm already dreaming. Try again never."

Jeremy added an exaggerated snore for extra effect and Michael mock punches him in the arm. He turns around and is greeted with half-lidded eyes and the same toothy grin he's seen for years. It was as genuine and as dorky as ever.

"C'mon, this is the part where we talk about deep shit, like we always do."

"I'm not up for talking about how the 80's was the pinacle of human society and how nothing else could ever compare."

"Then let's talk about something else you dork." Michael sort of squeezes him in a hug, and Jeremy is torn apart from enjoying it too little or too much.

A short, comfortable silence overtakes them as they both stare at the ceiling, waiting for someone to say something.

"Where do you wanna go for college?"

"I thought you didn't wanna talk about this today?" Jeremy asked

"Well today is technically tomorrow and I'm kinda curious."

"Well..." Jeremy sighed "I don't really know Michael."

Like every other teenager who had less than a year to graduate high school, Jeremy was one of the many who were freaking out about what to take up in college. He had no idea what to go for, and this uncertainty was punctuated with the fear that he might end up picking a course he would absolutely loathe in the future. It was a clichè type of fear, and Michael thought as much.

"You're kidding right?"

"I'm serious you ass, I don't know, I'm going to like...one of them?" Jeremy shifts his weight "That's what matters right?"

"Hmm."

"I don't even know what I'll even take up man...isn't this like, every teenager's dilemma?" Jeremy sighs "What the hell they'll become when they 'grow up' or whatever."

"Why are you asking anyway?"

"I was just...eh...wondering."

"Hmm."

_Wait. Something was off._

"Bullcrap man." Jeremy raised an eyebrow

"What do you mean?"

"Michael, the only time you say 'eh' is when you're guilty, lying, or both."

"I'm not guilty!"

"So you're lying."

"...........no."

"You also hesitate when you lie."

"Bluuuhhhhh." He groaned slamming a pillow on his face.

Michael was usually the laid-back of the two of them, and seeing him not being able to open up was really starting to worry Jeremy.

"C'mon what's bugging you."

"It's....it's nothing. And if it was something, it's really dumb. You wouldn-"

"Michael~" Jeremy started poking his face "Open up about your feeeeeelingsssss~"

Michael laughs but frowns right after, and it's enough to make Jeremy focus much more intently on his best friend. Another silence overtakes them, still comfortable, but it's  shrouded with uncertainty and concern. Mostly coming from Jeremy.

"Can.....can I say something stupid?" Michael was clearly hesitating

"You can tell me anything."

That line was unmistakably familiar and Jeremy notices, but this time it was filled with much more sincerity.

"When you were squipped...and when you left me for the popular kids, I felt really sad. Like really **really** sad. It was the saddest I've felt in a long time."

"Don't get me wrong, I was psyched to see you like that. That you finally got what you wanted." Michael avoided eye contact "That you were finally gonna be cool."

"I was happy for you."

Jeremy felt somthing inside him twist. A gut feeling. An instinct. A thought in the back in his head that made his body feel heavy and stiff. It felt like guilt.

"And I know it's really selfish of me to say this, but I wish you hadn't........I wish you hadn't taken the squip because then, I'd still have somebody to talk to."

"It just kinda sucked that you-hehe-you left me alone for-ha-so long, and I forgot how much it sucked being alone."

Michael was laughing. He was laughing with bitter words and low voice, and Jeremy knew for a fact that it wasn't a good thing. None of this was a good thing.

"I know, but-"

"But what really fucking sucked is that one time when you ditched me in the bathroom at the party. You left me all alone and called me...." Michael trailed off, not wanting to say it.

They fall into another silence, this one much more serious than the last. Jeremy awkwardly shifts his weight around the bed, not knowing what to say. Instead he looks up at the ceiling, waiting for his best friend to continue.

"......"

"And y'know, that's the moment I realized that everything about this was so terrible."

That string of words seemed familiar, and it made Jeremy feel bad, but hearing it come out from his best friend's mouth made him feel even worse.

"And I started freaking out y'know? I kept asking myself 'was I not allowed to hang out with my best friend?' Was he too cool now? Too cool for everything we've been through! **Too** **fucking** **cool**!"

"Too cool for video games!"

"Too cool for getting stoned in my basement!"

"I...."

"Too cool for hanging out with me!"

"Too cool..too cool...t-too......c-cool." Michael was stuttering. Michael never stutters.

"Michael....I'm-"

" **Too cool for a _loser_ like me.** " 

Jeremy's frown feels like guilt, he turns to face Michael and he realizes that his eyes are red and watery, but knowing that it isn't  from weed makes it all the more worse.

He was crying. It was quiet type of crying, the kind that was supposed to be the most discreet and unnoticeable, but for Jeremy it was the kind that hurt the most.

He feels his heartstings pull on each other, his chest heave violently, and tears threaten to fall. All from the sight of his best friend confess how much he hurt him from his selfish desire to be cool.

This is the worst Jeremy's felt his entire life.

He shifts his weight to face his best friend and takes him in his arms, Michael's face in his shoulder. He was huggging Michael. He was hugging Michael while he was crying and he realizes this is the first time they've hugged in years, and probably never as emotionally as this.

He was hugging Michael and nothing else mattered right now.

"Hey. It's gonna be okay."

"I-I'm just scared that you'll l-leave me again." Michael was shaking, which made Jeremy embrace him even tighter.

"Hey." Jeremy started to cry now as well "I'm always gonna be your best friend."

"Mmmpph."

"And you're always gonna be my favorite person _._ "

Jeremy feels Michael smile in his shoulder on the sound of his nickname, and he feels some of the tension release. He was just glad his friend was okay.

They continue like this for a while until Michael began to calm down. Even then they were still hugging, but less intensely then before.

"You were always there for me Michael, even when I wasn't there for me."

"After everything I've done to you. You always had my back, even when I didn't have yours."

"I know I fucked up dude, and I'm really really sorry."

"Hmm-mmm." Michael hummed in response

"I promise I'll make it up to you somehow."

"You just did."

"What?"

"That's all I needed."

Michael smiles weakly, which is enough to make Jeremy smile back, and he's happy that his friend was okay now, but he isn't quite satisfied by how lightly his friend is taking this. He felt like he needed to more.

"No way, man. This isn't enough! I'm gonna everything I can to make you feel better!"

Much more.

"Really Jeremy, its fine. I'm okay now."

"I-I'll buy you slushies, I'll bring you presents, I'll take to you dinner! I'll even listen to all the 80's music you like with you, I-"

"Pfffffftttt-Hahahah!"

"What's so funny?" Jeremy creases his eyebrows

Michael locks eyes with him, and he isn't sure if he should look away or not.

"Jeremy Heere, are you asking me out?"

"I'll-Huh.........wha?"

Did he hear that right? That was his mind playing tricks on him right? He probably dreamt that right? This is a dream right? That didn't just happen RIGHT?

"You heard me." Michael was smirking and Jeremy didn't know it was possible his face could go this red.

**Jeremy.exe has stopped responding.**

"Don't worry I'm just kidding you dork, as if! Hah, you almost bought it!

"Oh, haha."

Jeremy realizes it was a joke, and he feels stupid. He feels even more stupid, realizing how forced his laugh ends up sounding.

"And for the record, you don't have to constantly try to make up for everything."

"I'll do whatever you want!"

"I just want you to be my best friend again."

"Could you do that for me, Player two?"

He grins at the nickname and Jeremy hits him with a pillow to the face. The tension is back, but somehow it feels more comfortable.

With Michael, it was always comfortable.

"Well. That was emotionally draining." Michael chimes in "Can we go back to try being unconscious now?"

"You read my mind."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Michael in the bathroom by himseeeeeelf.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy Heere couldn't fall asleep for shit.
> 
> It's been approximately 25 minutes since the two teenagers had their heart warming moment together and Jeremy is aware of this because he's counted every single one.
> 
> Insomnia was a bitch.
> 
> Well. Maybe it wasn't insomnia.

Jeremy Heere couldn't fall asleep for shit.

It's been approximately 25 minutes since the two teenagers had their heart warming moment together and Jeremy is aware of this because he's counted every single one.

Insomnia was a bitch.

Well. Maybe it wasn't insomnia.

Nevertheless, it's not like he wasn't trying, he's doing everything he could to lose consciousness and more. But right now it's 3:22 AM, he's wide awake with a sensitive body and an overactive imagination, and his best friend is spooning him as if it was the most normal thing on earth.

It also didn't help that the only thing the two of them were wearing were flimsy t-shirts and some boxers.

At least Jeremy was in front of him. He was probably sure that he'd just stop functioning if Michael were to ask him why he felt like something was poking him _down there_. 

That couldn't possibly happen though, Michael was fast asleep.

"Jeremy? You still awake?" Michael's breath was hot on his neck.

Shit.

"Y-yeah. What's up man? I-I thought you were asleep?"

"That's the problem. I can't."

"W-what do you wanna do then?"

Michael pauses for a while and Jeremy isn't sure what emotion was running through his mind. He was probably reading too much into things anyway.

"Can you maybe....like..oh god this is gonna sound weird."

"Weirder than possesion via psychotic supercomputer?"

"Maybe?"

"C'mon man, I already told you. You can tell me anything."

"Okay....can you like.........rub my hair so I'll relax more? It's just....it makes me fall asleep better."

"Oh."

It's an invitation, and Jeremy isn't going to think about what it could possibly mean. He accepts it, because it would be more awkward to say no. Not because of anything else, of course.

Jeremy faces Michael and brings his hands to his head, nodding instead of saying anything, because he doesn't particularly trust his mouth right now.

"No homo though."

"..."

That takes him by surpirse, and he makes a face. The words don't feel right, coming out of Michael's mouth. It feels awkward and forced and ingenious. Jeremy has no idea how to respond, so he doesn't.

He's is clueless on how to start, so he runs one hand through his best friend's head, grazing it lightly with his fingernails. Michael exhales slightly, and Jeremy takes that as go-ahead to continue.

It's an incredibly intimate gesture, and he's sure the only person he'd do this with is his best friend.

Michael's hair is soft and smooth. His hands run through seamlessly as if it posed no resistance. Each individual strand felt like silk through his fingers, positioned in perfect circules that would curl back into place every single time.

It lets out sifts and puffs of Michael's shampoo scent and Jeremy can't help but lean in closer to smell his best friend's hair. He hopes Michael doesn't notice this.

He tries not to look directly in Michael's face, but his curiosity eventually betrays him. His eyes dart from his best friend's hair, to his eyes, and he realizes that he was staring at him.

He also realizes that Michael is red to the tips of his ears, and so is his face. He's blushing, which makes Jeremy blush as well. They're both incredibly conscious right now but somehow it isn't awkward or embarassing, they're just overwhelmed by the quiet intimacy surrounding them.

Michael leans in closer, and Jeremy is half-tempted to move away.

But he doesn't.

"Hey."

"Yeah?"

"You know I'd die for you right?"

Jeremy chuckles, and some of the tension dissipates. Michael is doing the same but you could see vulnerability in his eyes and sincerity in his grin. It was a question Michael wouldn't normally ask, but Jeremy normally wouldn't caress his best friend's hair either.

"Heh, that's a little dramatic, but yeah." Jeremy whispers "I'd do the same for you."

He's smiling right now, but in a different way. Jeremy isn't quite sure what it means, but he smiles back anyway.

They stay like this for quite some time, Michael slowly falling asleep through half-lidded eyes, painfully oblivious to how his best friend was freaking out only moments ago. He's more relaxed now though, probably because he feels closer to Michael than he's ever been. Figuratively and Literally.

Jeremy is still fondling his best friend's hair and at the same time, his breathing started to be more consistent and rhythmic. He could fall asleep like this, whether or not he'd like to admit it. And he almost does until a warm pair of hands, interrupt his own and gently wrap around his wrists.

 _Breathe_. 

They feel warm but seriously intense. Almost as intense as Michael's stare. Almost.

Michael was staring at him. Looking directly in his eyes, and suddenly Jeremy is immediately conscious about everything in this situation, mentally arguing with himself if he should jump out the window or not.

They're incredibly close to each other, barely inches apart. He starts to wonder how it got to this point because honestly, he's been acting on impulse the entire time.

There's a pause. A long excruciating pause. The room is deathly silent and even the rain seems careful and hushed. But for Jeremy, this is the loudest moment in his entire life.

There is a gap between the two. A small, tiny, insufferable gap, and Michael is trying to close it. He stops though, his eyes pleading and uncertain.

"Is this okay?"

Jeremy doesn't know what to say. He doesn't trust any thought his mind has right now, everything is on overdrive, everything is going haywire, everything is falling apart and building itself back up again, and the only thing he could focus on was Michael. His breath, his eyes, his voice.

Michael.

Jeremy knows what's coming, and wants it just as much, but he can't seem to close the gap, or say anything. So he looks at Michael and just nods.

And that was enough.

He blinks for one second, and suddenly feels a pair of lips on his, and everything immediately felt heightened. Too vivid to be a dream, but too surreal to be reality.

It's better than he'd ever imagined. The kiss was tender and careful, accompanied with a slow exhale, as if Michael was putting eveything aside for this one kiss. His eyes are closed, his mind at ease, he's acting on instinct, but Jeremy found it hard to relate.

A few agonizingly prolonged seconds later, Michael breaks away to see his best friend with wide eyes, a gaping mouth, and a face full of surprise. He looks shocked and probably disgusted, and Michael immediately regrets what he's done.

Jeremy takes a moment to asses what happened because what the fuck, he did not just get kissed by Michael Fucking Mell.

...

Holy shit he was just kissed by Michael Fucking Mell.

"I-I'm sorry! I didn't mean to do it!"

Michael is the one panicking now. A look of absolute dread carved all over his face. He sits up on the bed and starts incoherently spewing out words, while Jeremy was still dazed and dreaming.

"That was wrong and stupid and I shouldn't have done that!"

 _My best friend kissed me._  

"I crossed a line b-but didn't mean too I-I wasn't thinking straight!"

_I can't believe that my best friend just fucking kissed me._

"It w-was a mis-stake and it was dumb!"

_**Michael. Just. Kissed. Me.**  _

Jeremy looks at his best friend with a face he's never made before, and feels the chill he sends down his Michael's spine.

"It wasn't! I-I'm not-mmph!"

...

Michael Mell kissed Jeremy Heere.

So now, he's kissing back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> there's no way u can "no homo" ur way outta this one


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING. THIS IS SMUT. VERY GRAPHIC. PLEASE DO NOT READ THIS IF THIS MAKES YOU UNCOMFORTABLE.
> 
> yeah
> 
> otherwise enjoy :D

Michael's hands feel hot and heavy on his skin, spreading tingles throughout his body like wildfire. It's all Jeremy could focus on right now, especially since they were under his shirt, exploring every inch of his underexposed skin.

He's also focusing on a pair of lips, smashed against his own, forcefully kissing as much as he is, pouring every ounce of passion as they could muster.

The second kiss broke something between them. A barrier of uncertainty and doubt dividing the two from their true feelings for one another. Every notion of second-guessing themselves thrown out the goddamn window and heaven beyond. It's all replaced now, by want and need. Jeremy is unable to tell the difference between desire and necessity, because holyfuckingshit, Michael is all he can think about.

He's all too aware that this is the horniest he's ever been.

Michael opens his mouth and licks his best friend's upper lip, begging for access, Jeremy opens his mouth, almost too eager to comply. Their tounges aggresively meet inside each other's mouths, moaning symphonies through their sloppy make out session, teenage hormones overshadowing their inexperience.

Jeremy runs his hands through Michael's hair because it's all he can cling to right now, each contact of skin overwhelming all of his senses, sending shockwaves of pleasure throughout his entire body, and pooling to one very sensitive, very noticable point.

Michael feels this immediately and promptly breaks the kiss.

"Holy shit dude. I didn't know you liked it **_that_** much." 

Michael smirks, and Jeremy recognizes it as the same shit-eating grin he has whenever he beats him at something like Mario Kart, but he can't help but admire it when it was paired with messy hair and swollen red lips from kissing him. Wanting him.

"S-shut up man, this is the first time, in a long time, I've done something like this."

Jeremy exhales, he feels his breath ricochet off Michael, and it's just now that he notices how close the two of them are.

"What do you mean?"

"It's been months since I jacked off." Jeremy says out loud, his honesty surprising him.

Unfortunately it was true. Between being in the hospital, and catching up with school, Jeremy didn't have the nearly the amount of time a teenage boy needed to 'do the deed', and whenever he did have time, he'd just be reminded of the all 'sex pushups' the squip used as an unfair punishment, and it would kill the mood immediately.

"Oh. That's gotta suck."

"Yeah it does."

"So what happens when I do....this?"

Michael draws his hands from his best friend's chest and palms his overexcited length and instantly Jeremy is reduced to a string of curses that is almost too loud.

"FUCK! Fuu-uuck...mmmph!...shhhit...M-michael don't.....do that..."

"You want me to stop?"

"F-fuck no, it's just...it's good...just keep going."

Michael brings his hand down again and traces one finger up and down Jeremy's incredibly hard cock through his drenched boxers, and it's enough to entice an audible moan to escape his lips. Michael isn't kissing him right now, solely for the reason that he wants to see how his best friend reacts to all this.

His face looked ridiculously aroused. His entire face was red, spreading to his ears and shoulders. His mouth was covered with one hand, desperately trying to muffle his moans, and his eyes were sealed shut, as if he was hopelessly trying to hold on.

It made Michael feel like some kind of sex deviant, but he didn't care. He needed to see Jeremy.

"Dude your boxers are so wet now. Are you really that horny?"

"I told...you....that-fuck!-....I haven't..nggghh...jerked off in months."

"What if I just do this for hours?" Michael teases, and he doesn't know what the hell just go into him. He generously palms Jeremy once more and by this point, the oversensitve teenager has stopped trying to supress his moans.

"You w-wouldn't fucking dare."

"Just try me, Heere."

Jeremy stares at Michael with an unrecognizable emotion. It feels like annoyance but it was overwhelmed by a much stronger emotion. He knows Michael is bluffing, but right now he just wants nothing more to wipe that snide smirk off his lips.

By kissing him like there's no tomorrow.

He grabs Michael by the head, and smashes their faces together, quite literally in fact. Their noses nub past each other, and their teeth clink from the sudden force, it hurts, but feeling his best friend's lips on his was enough to make him ignore the pain.

The kiss doesn't last properly, and they break apart only moments later, realizing that they're both out of breath. It didn't even occur to them, until their lungs started despearately begging to fill them with air.

They're breathing heavily right now, foreheads against each other, staring intently with focused eyes. Their breaths intermingle in the most initmate way possible.

"Fuck....ha....Jeremy....do you know how....ha....long I've wanted this?"

"Tell me."

"So fucking long."

"Have you ever...." Michael trailed off.

"Jacked off thinking about you?"

"Yeah." Michael answers, surpised he knew exactly what he was gonna say.

"I wanted to, but I never let myself." Jeremy confesses.

"Really?."

"Well.......I did once."

"When?"

"Remember that time I called you and you told me I was acting weird?"

"What."

"Yeah....my Wi-Fi died mid way so I got off.....to your voice."

Michael isn't sure if his heart just stopped, or if it's pounding a thousand times faster, but he is sure he wanted the flustered teenage boy in front of him.

And he wanted him bad.

Michael kisses Jeremy once again but this time it's sloppier and messier than ever before. It's filled with a tidal wave of adrenaline that sends both of the boys cursing at each other with profanity so blatantly laced with lust, all because Michael just decided to grind his hips on the oversensitive boy below him.

Jeremy is moaning so loudly and uncontrollably, that he realizes that this is the first time he's ever moaned at all. This was new, and this was amazing.

The friction is enough to send Jeremy off the rails because right now, he's pissed off at his stupid goddamn boxers and shirt and Michael's even more stupid boxers and shirt.

He practically rips both their clothers off and throws it wherever the hell in the room, it was a barrier, a prison, a distraction. Something that separated him from Michael. It needed to be removed.

Now he has him all to himself.

Michael grabs him by the waist and Jeremy straddles him in response. They know what's coming and they won't stop until it's there.

"Michael-please..."

He whimpers, and Michael swears he's trembling as he pushes his hips up like he's begging.

It makes Michael want to hear more of that, to feel like Jeremy needs him like that.

He certainly needs Jeremy right now, every fibre in his body is screaming for him to just rut frantically against him, but if he could make Jeremy say it...

He pulls away, a thin line of saliva still connecting them for a moment. Eyes fixed on Michael's, both of them open-mouthed and red-faced, he trails his fingers ever-so-slowly down his thigh and back up, then along the arch of his hip. He lets his hand hover, and Jeremy shivers needily.

The temptation is beyond strong. It's making his breath hitch and his body ache, to just grab both their cocks and jerk them more violently and more wildly than he could ever plan to. He needed release so desperately, Jeremy's already dripping with so much precome it lathered his and Michael's entirely.

He's intoxicated.

Shaky hands cover Michael's back as they are lost on where to go. Jeremy's pretty sure he's pressing down his fingernails as hard as he can, but Michael doesn't seem mind. He's too focused on his best friend's cock, and how it's throbbing oh so violently against his, aching for release as much as he is.

He can't help it, his hips rock forward needily and he bites his lip to hold back the involuntary sounds. His eyes flicker closed and he's so completely lost in the sensations that he doesn't notice Michael pulling him closer until there's hot breath on his ear.  
  
Nothing else is real right now. Just Michael, Michael, and only Michael.

The world could be on fire right now, and Jeremy Heere, couldn't give less of a shit.

"Let me hear you." The words come out as a breathy moan, shaky and overwhelmed, just like he is, yet it's exactly what keeps him going.

He pulls Jeremy even closer now, so close that he can practically hear his heart pound with his. He wraps his fingers around both their cocks and the sensation is making his eyes blur and the world spin. They're trembling, oversaturated with pleasure, but Michael keeps pumping and pumping and Jeremy can't help but jerk his hips with in unison, his precome is generously slick, making moment easy, covering both of them entirely.

He thrusts again, a bit too overzelously, and it makes Michael grip them together tightly, his breath is audible and sharp but Jeremy can't stop now, and Michael is far from complaining.

Everything is all so intense, it's just Michael, all Jeremy knows is Michael, Michael's tounge, Michael's mouth, Michael's hands, Michael's cock, uncontrollably hot and hard on his own, throbbing and leaking so much. All he can feel is Michael, every ounce of body heat erratic and limitless. Michael's hips thrusting, thights shaking --

" **Mi-CHAAAEL**!" 

Jeremy arches his back as he comes, way too fucking much, splattering all over his best friend's stomach and chest, reaching all the way to his mouth. His orgasm is ridiculously drawn out, sending him, moaning, reeling, craving every second of it, some of his come even landing on Michael's dick.

Amidst all this, he realizes Michael isn't quite finished as he is though, and his disoriented brain had an incredibly sound idea. Jeremy pushes him down and jumps on him without any hesitiation, and before Michael could protest, his head was already between his legs, pushing his thighs apart.

Michael barely lasted seconds as a wet, hot mouth wrapped all around him, with a sucking sensation that sent his body convulsing in violent orgasm. A tongue circled frantically around his length and it takes every last drop of willpower Michael had left to not fuck Jeremy's throat.

Michael jolts up instantly as he explodes into Jeremy, and it floods his mouth, seeping through the sides, dribbling down his chin. It tastes thick and salty, overpowering his senses, and it gets caught at the back of his throat.

He's all too aware of the cream-white fluid pouring out his mouth, until Michael kisses him for one last time, tasting himself on Jeremy's tongue. Savoring every second as their souls intertwine.

It's all bliss.

It's all compassion.

It's paradise.

Until oxygen decided to exist.

The two of them are breathing heavily now, Jeremy collapsed in the nook of Michael's shoulder, his brain still going on tangents on how unrealistically euphoric that was, and if it even happened in the first place.

"Hey...." Michael is still gasping for air

"What?"

There is a pause, but the two boys don't seem to care.

"I love you."

Jeremy's brain can think right now, so his heart speaks for him instead.

"I love you too."

They lay down there on the bed with closed eyes and unconscious smiles. The rainfall providing an inconceivable amount of comfort.

Words fail to describe how the two boys felt right now. Everything was right in the world, everything was incredible, everything was beautiful, and at this moment, it feels like the anything else would just fall away.

"Hey, Michael."

"Yeah?"

"I would live for you."

"Heh."

Michael is hugging Jeremy now, and he doesn't plan on ever letting go. They fall asleep, knowing that the other would be there for them, and it fills them with a feeling.

It feels like warmth and belonging.

It feels like love and sincerity.

It feels like your best friend cradled in your arms.

And it's the best feeling in the world.

Perhaps, more than surviving would be easier than he thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last Chapter! Sorry if it was so delayed, school is just rlly annoying, and I just wanted everything to be perfect.
> 
> As always please oh please leave criticism! It helps me grow as a writer.
> 
> Anyway, thanks for reading <3


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